38 weeks...

I am 38 weeks today. That sounds like so close to being done yet it seems so far away. Everyone keeps asking the loaded "How are you feeling?" question. Luckily, Blake came up with the perfect response for me, 

"Physically I am doing great. Emotionally is a little touch and go."

Physically, I am a late-pregnancy rockstar. I paint chicken coops, weed gardens, and mow lawns like nobody's business. People think I am crazy but physical labor is the only thing that keeps me sane at this point. I get seriously stir-crazy the last few weeks of pregnancy - all I can think about is when will this baby come - and I have a hard time dealing with anything else due to this preoccupation.

Emotionally, I am a late-pregnancy trainwreck. I can't handle anything, such as:

*Not knowing when this baby will arrive. We have a small window that is convenient - I am pretty sure this baby won't be convenient, which is fine. I just wish I could prepare for the inconvenience.

*The dozen or so school obligations that have popped up due to it being the last month of school. I completely ignored the "Please do these 3 things for teacher appreciation week" email, lied to the girls saying, "I thought the book fair ended on Friday." and am dreading having to take all four kids by myself to the school carnival.

*My inability to run. Blake is at an all-time running high and I am incredibly jealous. I miss the solitariness of it. I miss the pain. I miss having a hobby outside of mommy-hood.

*Paying bills and getting oil changes and talking to grocery clerks are 1000 times harder then they should be. I can't handle being an adult right now.

*Not knowing whether I should ask to be induced when I blow past my due date.

*Insane dreams that keeps me up for a good 20 minutes after each episode. I am pretty sure people pay good money for hallucinatory drugs to achieve the level of psychosis that my pregnant mind comes up with.

*My son's muddy boots tracking dirt across my freshly-mopped floor:
(I started reading a book about tidying and after 3 chapters I threw it across the room - probably the worst thing I could have picked up the last month of my pregnancy with nesting instinct high and mess tolerance at an all-time low. I didn't need to add any fuel to the fire by reading a book from someone with no kids proclaiming just how easy it was to keep your house clean.)


Britt said...

I remember this. Oh, how I remember this! I won't even try to say anything

Britt said...

^^^oh look! Half a comment!

What I was TRYING to say was, I won't even try to say anything encouraging because I know there is nothing encouraging to be heard at this point. The end if pregnancy is just awful.

HowellAZ said...

Oh my - I just so identified with those muddy boots! I mean, as you know, my house is in complete shambles 24 hrs a day, however, on the rare occasion that I take time to try and get it clean, I want to hit my head in to a brick wall repeatedly. I do one room and by the time I walk back in to it, it appears as though it was never cleaned. There's a good definition of insanity. Hang in there, friend! The baby will be here soon and you'll be back to not only rocking the physical, but also the emotional. Because, you are a real life rockstar!