4.14.2014

The post where I will lose my last 5 readers because I take a swing at their beloved Costco...

I bummed a ride off my friend's Costco membership the other day to buy diapers. (The Kirkland brand diapers are golden and I am talking little-boy's-first-pee-of-the-morning-gallons-of-urine golden.)  

There was once a time when I was cool enough to merit my own membership, but then I came to the realization that Costco members LOVE taking non-Costco members to Costco. (It helps them feel like they are getting good usage out of that $55 they spend a year to shop there.) So I became that person.

You know the one that bums rides to Costco because they are cheap...

And because they have awesome family/friends who put up with it...

And because seriously no one cares if you ask, "Hey can I go to Costco with you next time you go?" Most the time they are just happy to share the warehouse-shopping love.

Every time I walk in, I am sure to keep a close distance to my friend. They are my ticket in - they know it, I know it, and the bouncer verifying membership knows it. As I pass by the card checker and my friend flashes her card, I can't help but feel like a fraud.

Once inside I peruse the merchandise. I have come to the conclusion that Costco is the master of attracting impulse buys. Once I saw a pile of giant stuffed toys for dogs. They came in a three pack. They cost $19.99. They were landing in people's carts. You have to know that not a single one of those people went into that store thinking, "I am going to drop 20 bucks so Fido has something to tear up this afternoon."

But the true walk-of-shame is at the check-out when my friend asks for separate orders and they look at me and say, "Oh, are you NOT a member?" And I have to hang my head in humiliation and say, "No - I am just here for the diapers." That's me. The nonmember.

Every time I think about how successful Costco is it boggles my mind. I wish I was there in the board meeting when they came up with the business model.

"I got it! Let's make a store but...       wait for it...       make people pay to shop there."
"Ohhhhhhh - I like it. And instead of buying just 1 of each item we will make it so they have to buy 20."
"And instead of shelves, we will just lay everything out on pallets."
 "And we will only sell high-end brands."
"Yes! And after they have checked out and just spent $200 on toothpaste and shredded cheese, they will have no problem hitting up our concession stand where we will sell hot dogs for a measly $1.50."
"Oh - this will totally work!"
"Yea, we just need to include one thing - samples."
"Naturally."

Those guys were genius - just like their diapers.

4 comments:

AndersonGR8 said...

You are always welcome to ride in my cart on my weekly visits to Costco. I'll even buy you a gelato...

Kelsey said...

haha poor Cyndi! I will make sure that we keep it ONE order instead of two! :)

Starla said...

I agree with Kelsey! And, I have a membership, so any old time you want to ride the sample wagon at Costco, just let me know! :)

HeidiT said...

Cyndi,Thank you for your kind words on my blog. I am strengthened by hearing others stories as well. The message Blake sent me when he saw our loss posted of FB was touching as well as he spoke about the role Talmage played in your family and especially that your children know their brother.
I promptly searched out every stillbirth/infant loss story possible from the library :) Exact Replica was the first one I read and I loved it. But I don't have my own copy and love the idea of reading it every year,I think I will try that too!
I have read through your blog and am touched by many of the same experiences that we have had through loss. And I am thankful in reading as well that life continues after loss - that the sting never leaves but possibly becomes bearable.